


A Series of Firsts

by lalablue0



Series: Noraverse [3]
Category: Prospect (2018)
Genre: Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Blood and Injury, Cee (Prospect) - Freeform, Explicit Language, Ezra (Prospect) - Freeform, Ezra/Nora - Freeform, F/M, Mental Health Issues, Non-Graphic Smut, Nora (OFC) - Freeform, Prospect (2018) - Freeform, Smut, noraverse
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-14
Updated: 2020-05-14
Packaged: 2021-03-03 00:00:13
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,235
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24185536
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lalablue0/pseuds/lalablue0
Summary: A series of firsts for Ezra and Nora. Three vignettes covering more moments in the life of Ezra, Nora and, Cee.
Relationships: Ezra/Nora
Series: Noraverse [3]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1750858
Kudos: 7





	A Series of Firsts

**Author's Note:**

> Please take note of the tags so that you may have an idea of what you can expect in this chapter. Make sure you click next work for the next chapter in the continuing saga of Ezra, Nora and Cee.

**A Series Of Firsts**

She does want.

She does need.

She can be wanted.

She can be needed.

She does not have

a love to call hers.

A waste of her love.

A waste of her heart.

  
  
  


**Mom**

The first time Cee called Nora "Mom”, neither of them seemed to catch it in the early morning rush of getting ready for work and school. Ezra was sitting at the table enjoying his eggs when Cee asked a simple question and prefaced it with the endearment. Nora answered and they both continued eating. Ezra paused with the fork half way to his mouth. His eyes darted back and forth between the two. After a moment with no acknowledgment from either about the new word that unexpectedly entered the conversation, he thought perhaps he had just imagined it.

Once Cee left for school though Nora broke down and ran into his chest crying earnestly.

"She called me Mom. Ez. She called me Mom."

Ezra held Nora's petite frame and gently stroked small circles between her shoulder blades. "I know. I know she did. Why does that upset you?"

Nora looked up into Ezra's concerned eyes. He could feel her wanting to break down again. "I don't know if I deserve it," she finally choked out before burying her face back into his chest. He could feel the chill of the wetness against his skin.

"Wife. That beautiful little girl has elected you to be her mama. You earned that mantle long before she ever spoke the word," Ezra took her hand in his and kissed her palm before placing her hand over his shoulder. He placed his hand on her waist and began swaying with her to an unheard melody, "I always said you'd make an excellent mother one day, did I not?"

A sad smile graced Nora's face. For a fleeting moment, he saw another emotion in her features. It may have been years since he'd seen it, but he recognized it. Regret. Did she regret not having a child of her own? Did she regret that Cee was not her child? Did she regret that if it hadn't been for Ezra, Cee would still have her father? Or maybe she regretted that she really hadn't been given much choice in the matter?

"I fully intended to give you a child one day. I kind of thought though we would have made one from scratch. However these older models come fully trained and are rather self sufficient so there's that."

Nora broke out into a wide grin. Ezra watched the barely perceptible shift in her posture and demeanor as she tested the words again, "She called me Mom." The tears that Ezra felt soaking through his shirt were from joy.

\--

I give my best and take my bow

as the spotlight fades to black.

Hear the roar like thunder

it's calling me home.

Your love is like a beacon.

My one safe place is you.

**The First Time Since the Last Time**

It's been three months since Bakhroma Green. Ezra was going stir crazy. He had begun taking afternoon walks, but the cold season was starting and the chilled air hurt his lungs. He felt his belly grow soft from inactivity.

Nora and Cee had their routines and it involved leaving Ezra alone all day. Nora went to work and took care of people, only to come home and take care of him. Sure, he had been able to do some light housework and cooking, but he longed for something more.

He had a voice but the silence was his punishment. The days blurred into one another. His wounds were considered healed. He slept most days and watched Nora sleep at night. His breath still hitched when she climbed into their bed each night. She felt familiar and foreign and forgotten. He often touched her while she slept. Nothing more than ghostly contact against her bare shoulders and face. It was little more than a tease. He longed for something more.

He had the words but lost the poetry. The confines of their little flat in winter made him lonely. He had come to miss the wide open space of The Green. Even under the canopy of trees, in the thickest of underbrush, it had still felt more open than his current situation. When his brother and crew abandoned him there he thought for sure that was where he would take his final rest. He thought he had died when he awoke to see her face beside him. One moment he was heading to the drop pod and next... He had given up on finding her. Isn't that always the way? You find what's lost when you stop looking.

He had love but her loss made him indifferent. He had forgotten how intoxicating she was. He gladly bowed to her every whim, bent to fulfill her every desire. Her sway over him was infinite. He would wait a million lifetimes to move within her again. He longed for her.

She lay beside him, tucked into the crook of his right side. The curve of her hip stretched to fit the curve of his waist. Her form fitting sleepwear showing off her sleek lines. He tried to resist his urge. He swallowed hard and felt his nerve endings fire with passion.

When he looked down at her and her eyes were opened. He realized he had been stroking her thigh. She turned to face him. He expected to be chided but she caressed his cheek instead. He brought his hand to meet hers and kissed her palm. He thought he recognized the fire in her eyes. The same fire she had many years ago when she bedded him. He felt himself harden at the thought. She must have felt it too because her hand traveled down his chest and hovered over his waist.

“I want you,” He whispered against her ear, “I need you. I need to move in you again my beautiful Nora,” his hand stretched around her back pulling her closer to him.

She buried a hand between them and gently traced the outline of his cock through the fabric of his boxers. An euphoric rush crashed inside his brain and he shuddered.

“I want you too,” She whispered into his ear. She released him from the constraints of his boxers. She laid Ezra flat on his back while she sat upright. She pulled the boxers completely off and tossed them on the bed next to her. She licked her lips and grasped his shaft and pulled a few quick strokes before she bent down to bring the tip to her lips. She grinned as her lips parted and took him inside of the warm comforting softness that was her mouth.

Ezra brought his hand over his eyes. He feared the loss of control that came with want and desire. He toyed with the idea of this moment for years. He vowed only to love her and he never could stand the thought of being with another. For so long he waited for her. Now her mouth worked the length of his cock and he knew he wouldn't last long.

“Oh wife, I have missed you so,” he drawled.

She hummed her agreement and it electrified Ezra. His hips bucked up into her mouth. He could feel the burning deep in the pit of his stomach and knew he would soon feel the sweet release.

“I'm going to cum,” Ezra managed to warn before filling Nora's mouth. She sucked every last drop into her hallowed cheeks and swallowed.

She sat up and wiped her mouth with the back of her hand. Ezra sat up to kiss her and taste himself on her lips. He pulled her top over her head and started to pull at the hem of her trousers.

Nora pulled away breathless and asked, “Are you sure you are ready?”

Ezra answered by sliding his hand between her thighs and pushing two of his fingers inside of her. She threw her head back and she had to catch her breath. She helped remove her panties completely and pushed Ezra back against the bed pillow. He pulled her into an ardent kiss. He cursed not having his right hand to double his tactile pleasure.

She straddled his hip and paused. He licked his lips in anticipation as he stared at her when she reached between her legs to guide his cock into her. She teased his tip at her slick entrance before sliding down to the hilt. They were puzzle pieces fitting together to finally complete a picture. She was hot, wet and tight. He was home.

He knew she wanted to go slow, but adrenaline and pulsating desire got the better of him and he bucked his hips, forcing her to meet his aggression with speed. She ground her hips and Ezra thumbed her clit. She panted in pace with their sloppy rhythm. She let out an unabashed moan as her climax peaked quickly due to their frantic pace. Ezra pulled her down into a kiss.

“Shhh, wife, you'll wake the kid,” Ezra whispered with a grin.

She panted hard against him, trying to quietly come down from the climax but Ezra continued to fuck her at an unrelenting pace. He pushed her hip down with each upthrust and the friction burned a fire in their bellies. Her fingers dug deep into his belly; surely to leave marks behind.

He had so missed her soft flesh. The gentle roundness of her breasts. The way they bounced in time with each thrust. She had changed little with age. A few fine lines around her mouth and eyes, a little softness to her belly, and new body art that matched her personality. She still illuminated his darkness.

She covered her mouth as she felt another orgasm begin to push her over the edge. Her muffled cries still loud in the quietness of the night. Her body tightened around him and he followed her orgasm with his own. Hips shuddering she continued to tighten around him, milking every drop from him. He saw stars.

He grunted as he pulled out and left her a crumpled heap on top of him. Ezra kept his eyes closed for a while after that Nora thought he must have fallen asleep. He could feel her eyes upon him. He knew she was watching him breath. She grasped his hand and took his pulse. Ezra felt the smile spread across his face.

Nora giggled lightly, “It's okay, love. Just making sure I didn't kill you.”

“At last I am at peace,” he started, “I could die a happy man.”

“I'd rather you didn't though. I'd very much like to do that again sometime,” Nora said as she helped Ezra back into his boxers.

He grabbed her wrist loosely and looked her in the eyes, “I love you, wife. I love you.”

She smiled gently and leaned in to kiss him. “I love you too. Husband,” she giggled. Honestly giggled. He imagined that is what angels sounded like. “I'll be right back,” and disappeared into the bathroom. She even had the courtesy not to turn on the light till after she closed the door.

He stared up at the ceiling. The night air suddenly felt cold without her beside him. He struggled a bit with their blanket trying to find comfort in the empty bed. While her trip to the toilet was brief, he longed for her.

\--

  
  


Without wings I still take to flight

as the cold dark day fades into the cold dark night

The stars overhead guide me to my final destination

The only place my soul can find salvation.

The inevitable end to the world I once knew.

The inevitable end to the love I have for you.

  
  


**Grief**

He held her hand in his as they walked the length of the hallway. There were lots of fancy words that he for once did not know. Words that Nora knew and he could see that she didn't like them. She had asked him if he wanted this.

The dark circles under his eyes were even darker under the harsh fluorescent lights. The cold porcelain sink rubbed against his bare belly and he leaned closer to his reflection. He could hear the voices swirling in his head. All sounded eerily like his own. All but one. The voices crowded his brain. Overlapping into a crescendo of high pitched screams and deafening whispers.

The idea of a prosthesis had both excited and frightened him. He believed that he had made his peace with the loss and was becoming quite adept at using his left hand for all his tasks. He however could not deny that a prosthetic would allow him to return to some semblance of normalcy.

"I don't want to talk about it," his voice was deep and soft.

“Ez, please. Talk to me. If I'm pressuring you into something you don't want, you need to tell me,” Nora pleaded from the doorway.

Ezra turned to face her. He attempted to keep his face neutral as he worked up the will to speak. He sighed deeply, “There is pressure, wife, but not from you,” he moved closer to her. He took her hand in his and he smiled gently. “I fear my brain is overwhelmed with possibilities. I want it, I do. With it, I can help contribute to this family,” his smile faltered, “I also don't want it. I am aware of my limitations and very well prepared to live with it. You said that there would have to be another surgery and then months of rehab and I fear I am not prepared to place myself in that situation again. I already put you and Cee through so much.”

A puzzled look crossed Nora's features. She approached things logically. She was a student and teacher. She had an insatiable thirst for knowledge and the ability to share what she learned. She explained in great detail what would be involved to obtain a prosthesis. She made sure that Ezra had all the information he needed to make an informed decision.

Nora frowned and shook her head. “You need time. This is a lot to absorb. We don't have to do this now. We can talk-”

Ezra slammed his fist into the mirror shattering it into the sink below. “Damn it! I said I don't want to talk about it.”

The silence that followed was deafening. Ezra shut his eyes and breathed deeply. He felt his heart jump to his throat and he swallowed back the urge to vomit. He could feel Nora staring daggers into him. He gripped the edge of the sink but felt glass cut into his palm. He slammed the sink in anger. He didn't even look at her as he stomped past her into the kitchen.

“Fuck,” he mumbled under his breath. His knuckles were bleeding where he connected with the mirror, his palm bleeding from the shards.

“Fuck,” he cursed again when he realized there were little droplets of blood that followed him from the bathroom to the kitchen.

“Are you done?” Nora asked with her hands on her hips. He glanced back at her, but couldn't face her.

His promises meant nothing. He spent too many years without her. Too many years letting his anger guide him. Letting his fist do the talking. When she stepped toward him he took a step in the opposite direction.

She crossed the distance between them without fear. He remembered her fear. How she had flinched under his touch. When he walked away from her, he left a piece of his soul with her. It was the part of his soul that seemed to be able to feel guilt for the atrocities he has committed. He thought of what his mother would whisper every night before he went to sleep. He wondered how disappointed she would be in him. She took his hand with an unearned gentleness.

She examined his hand and guided it under the faucet. She wiped away the loose pieces of glass and poked at the few bigger pieces that were stuck still in his palm. She brushed her fingers across her bloodied knuckles.

“Careful, it's sharp,” Ezra hissed as she picked at a particularly jagged piece.

“Here, keep your hand under the water. I have to get my kit,” Nora said in reference to her personal supply of medical necessities, “You're going to need some stitches.”

She worked in silence as she set up the suture kit. She used tweezers to pull the broken shards from his hand. Ezra felt the palpable tension between them.

“I upended Cee's world when I killed her father. She shot me and amputated my arm,” Ezra poured his emotions out, “I killed her father and she took a piece of me. I killed her father and I am fucking adopting her. I don't deserve to get a replacement for my arm. I don't deserve the happiness that would come with it. I upended your life. I killed her father and you were my reward. I killed -”

Nora held his trembling hand in hers. “Ez, Ez, Ezra. Stop. You can't do this to yourself. You can not,” she sighed deeply, “What did I always tell you?”

Ezra blinked away the hot tears that stung his eyes and repeated the mantra that Nora drilled into his brain from the day they met, “Can't change the past, move on, do better.”

“Can't change the past, move on, do better,” Nora spoke the words with him. “You said your bad boy ways were behind you. That's what you told me, remember?”

Ezra nodded.

“You said that Cee and I make you want to do better. Yes?”

Ezra nodded again, “I broke my promise. I raised a hand, it may not have been toward you, wife, but I raised a hand.”

Nora shook her head, “Oh, stop. You punched a mirror. Big deal. You have issues, Ez. We will work through this. You've been through a lot too.”

“Not as much as Cee,” Ezra started.

Nora interrupted, “Yes, she lost her father. But Ez, you lost a body part. That shit's traumatic. It's okay to feel that loss.”

He was lost within his own thoughts. He snapped out of his reverie and finally gazed up at her. He hadn't realized he had stopped breathing until the first rush of air invaded his lungs. He hated being so honest with his feelings. He knew that he could tell her anything. He knew that she would come up with the words that would ease his mind and mend his heart. She was a healer after all.

He was so angry all the time. He missed his arm. He held all that anger inside of him because he was afraid to scare Nora. He was afraid she would be the one to leave him and never return. He was afraid that he would lose that piece of soul again. She gave him permission to feel his loss and suddenly he did. It didn't come out as the anger he repressed, but in grief and tears. He mourned his loss.

She held him tight as he rode out the waves of emotion that he finally allowed himself to feel.

A momentary hiccup that came and went.


End file.
